Finding Time to be "Us" | Loving Him

Face it.

Y'all don't get the "We" time that y'all deserve. Right?

There's children that need attending to and GASP! Fed....

There's animals that need the cuddles and pets they deserve.

There's bills that need to be paid, floors that need swept, cars that need fixing, food that needs to be bought, walls that need painting ... I mean, I could go on for days about all the stuff that is needed to be maintained when you're married or cohabiting.

But you know the one that thing that mostly gets overlooked?

Yeah. The reason WHY you're living together.

You actually LIKE each other.

You enjoy each other's company, you love cuddling up, you love being "US."

So how come many couples forget to take a breather and focus on something for just them?

I know I'm guilty.

We get so focused on life, we forget to live it.

My husband and I haven't had a "date night" in what seems like forever. We've just moved to a new city, so we don't have a babysitter that will take on our children - that we trust. So, a night out really isn't in the cards right now.

 BUT

• We have figured out a way to still have us time once the kids are asleep.
• We've purchased adult coloring books ... and colored together with a bottle of wine next to us.
• We've answered silly questions about each other in a silly couple's book I bought from the store.
• We've cuddled on the couch and watched a grown up film that doesn't involve cartoon characters.
• We've baked cookies together.
• We've also sat outside and watched the lightening.
• We even run races together... 

I mean, there's so much to do to with your partner, even if you don't have the money to go out, the babysitter, the time ... ect. You have to make it happen.

Because face it, this is the reason why you have the life you have.

To be together. 

Make the most of it.

So if you'll excuse me, I need to go figure out how to put a screaming toddler into his night pamper so that this movie date on the couch will actually happen!

Good luck y'all!

Quick Circuit Workout & Motivation | 'Werkit' Out Wednesday

Hey guys!

Have you been consistent in working out?

Surprisingly  .... I have! 

It's freaking awesome when you have a group of people who want to see you achieve the goals you want. I am part of a September weightless challenge that has numerous people challenging each other to get to the healthy lifestyle they want.

There's $350 at stake and I super want that moola! ;)

But more importantly, I'm being supported by people as well as being challenged by people who believe in what I'm doing. What I also like is that the coaches are inspiring us to continue, even though we may fail at weekly challenges or suffer through them. But they inspire us to continue.

And I dig that.

I also am part of two momma work out groups here. The Strolling Eagles (Team RWB) and The No Excuse Moms group.

These women pretty much are my accountability people. We have scheduled workouts on certain days and times. We push each other to get through a workout, run faster, farther, and just become the role models for our children that they deserve.

And I dig that.

My advice for you? Get a group together or search for one.

I am constantly not wanting to work out but because I know that these women are counting on me to show up, I show up. Suck through the workout, and then feel better about myself because I did it.

I mean, I DID IT. Even though I didn't want to.

And to end this motivational/workout post ... a quick circuit for you to do.

The Strolling Eagles did this work out last Monday and now I'm sharing with you. Why? Because the leader had to cut her workout short because of a school conference and the weather was ucky and no one wanted to stay anything longer than they had to. But you know what? Once everyone said their goodbye, me and the littlest stayed and completed our circuit .... eventually making it to 3 miles put in that day. So here it is!

Thank you to Sheena of Be Fit to Flourish for the workout!

Good luck y'all! My arms were dead after this workout! LOL! Remember ...

"Werkit" Out today! 

PCS?! What the What?! Part 6 | My Hot Mess

Hey y'all! This is the final part of my PCS?! What the What?! Series. If you haven't seen the first 5 parts, check 'em out here:  PART 1, PART 2,  PART 3, PART 4 & PART 5

This final portion is about getting to know your new location. I touched on it a little bit on Part 4 but I want you to know something ...

YOUR NEW LOCATION IS WHAT YOU MAKE OF IT.

No. Seriously. 

You could be stationed to the middle of no where and STILL have a blast, as long as you set out to make the best of this move.

I talked about all the stress, complained about all the issues, expressed my frustration on pretty much everything about this first PCS for us. But you know what?

I am ready for a new location for my family.

I want them to experience this new culture out here and to enjoy themselves.

Even if this move was a total inconvenience for ALL OF US.

First things first, find the local newspaper. 

You know, that black and white paper looking thing that folds out to a ginormous amount of information?! I mean, hello. I know the print media is slowly slipping away, but the best way to find out about your new location is their local newspaper.

Before we left, I began to check out all sorts of information about El Paso. The newspaper talks about crime rate, government climate, the ACTUAL weather climate, organizations that are involved with the city and the most important thing for me, EVENTS.

I'm a busy bee. I mean, if you couldn't tell by this entire blog ... I like to stay busy.

Number one on my list is knowing what there is to do around town. Some might say learning about the Post is the first thing to do ... but face it, the military isn't number one in my book.

GASP.

I know right?! I certainly just said that! ha!

The local community is most important when it comes to my family enjoying themselves.

I Googled pretty much everything there was to do and see in El Paso. I asked in local Facebook groups where to hang out, eat, babysitters, ect.

I also was lucky enough to know two people currently living here in El Paso; a high school acquaintance and a prior military friend. Both my husband and I reached out to them and asked about dentists, daycares, places to live, things to do, ect.

Word of mouth is the BEST way to find out anything.

When my husband and I arrived here, we found out the city has a damn app! I mean, when I heard that I KNEW this city was going to be awesome. The App is full of information on events and what not going on in the city and around in nearby towns. We also hit up Facebook events to find out what people did in their spare time. Through those Facebook event finds, we also talked to people at events and found out even more to do. When I finally found myself a hairstylist here, he told me about all sorts of things to do here since he was born and raised here.

Like I said, word of mouth is the best way to figure out things to do.

I am a very community oriented person, so I made sure to stop by the chamber of commerce, the visitor center, the libraries, Fort Bliss MWR, and even attended the "new comers" brief on post. I mean shit, if they're going to offer these things, you might as well go right?!

We've found out about museums, baseball games, concerts, FREE movies and events, festivals, running races, water parks, playgrounds, murals, trail hikes, ghost tours, arts shows.... name it we've found out and continue to find out more.

Just this past weekend, we found out about how awesome this place becomes in October due to Halloween and Day of the Dead events. I mean, hello?! If we hadn't stopped to check out a local art gallery I wouldn't have found out about the paranormal society here and the amazing last Thursday artist showcases!

HELLO?! 

If you are going to sit and mope about having to move and being in a place where people call it "Hell Paso." Of course you're going to hate it! You make it what it is. If you think it sucks, it's going to suck.

Shit, we made Fayetteville fun and exciting. We can make any town or city exciting.

Get out there and explore y'all.

I mean it. You are going to hate life if you stay cooped up inside your house doing nothing.

So put your adult panties/boxers on and get out there!

(unless you free ball it ... then just make sure you're wearing pants that don't have holes in them)

Good luck!

Picking Up Where You Left | Girl Boss

Guys ... moving your business SUCKS.

S
U
C
K
S

I'm serious.

My business is also an LLC - a corporation, so in my opinion, it was even more difficult to move it from North Carolina to Texas.

I don't mean literally picking it up and moving it, I mean legally ... the paperwork involved. It blew majorly.

So because I'm not a lawyer ... that's my disclaimer ... as I was reading the mambo-jambo fine print of taxes and LLCs and whatever, I discovered that it would cost more to transfer my LLC from NC to TX than it would to close in NC and reopen in TX.

I know ... me even writing that out in layman terms was confusing.

Basically if I brought my NC LLC to TX, it would be treated as a foreign entity and I would not only have today takes in Texas, I'd also have to pay in North Carolina.

What the what?! 

I know right?

Because of that, I decided to legally close my NC business and reopen a TX one.

Even though it's still the same business.

I was worried that it would effect my credibility going from a business that was open since 2010 to a business opened in 2016. BUT ... now this is where my advice plays into this entire post ... I decided to go to the El Paso Chamber of Commerce and ask them how to go about this.

They set me up with a business mentor here in El Paso who's and business owner and qualified to give other small business owners advice. After speaking with him, I realized that I'm actually not as dumb as I thought I was one this. What he suggested was the same thing I had already put into play.

And guess what? My business is still considered opened in 2010 ... it was just, in all reality, closed for 3 months, while I moved. No credibility of long term business was lost!

I was good.

He also suggested online links and other personnel to help me get the information I needed to ensure my business was set up properly and most importantly, legally.

Each state has different rules on taxes, permits, licenses, and what not. I strongly suggest you stopping by your chamber of commerce to get the help you need. They will also have the contact information for any small business organizations that will help you out as you go.

Because of them, I was able to pretty much set up my business within 2 months. (it was a little slow because I was more focused on unpacking the house and ensuring it was ready for the kids).

And now for the next part of "the suck" of moving a business.

Clientele.

This is a hard one. It took me years to get the clientele I wanted in North Carolina. I don't have that many years here to grab them. I only have about three years here. It took me three years in North Carolina to get the clients I wanted.

So what does that mean?

That means I have to hustle! 

I reached out to like-minded people here in El Paso, trying to network and find a community that supports small business owners. This is a slippery-slope because many in my profession don't want to help each other out and they're out for blood.

Life of a creative.

However, I have been really lucky lately and found some great business owner "friends" to reach out to and receive the support I needed. As I give back to them as well.

What's the saying?

"Those who want to see others succeed, also succeed in life."

Or something like that.

As I learn more about moving a business, I'll share with you in this series. If you have any tips or comments, please share with me and the other readers!

Shit, if it makes this whole moving thing easier, why not right?!

Good luck y'all!

I Ain't Ashamed | Girl Boss

Guys.

I work from home.

I have a toddler.

Sometimes, you gotta do what you gotta do to get shit done.

After all, you're STILL running a business.

When you know your raging toddler is tired but won't take a nap because he's a

"Big Boy Now."

I mean, you even turned his crib into toddler bed. So, I guess he's right.

Right?

Nope, because this sweet baby boy is being a monster right now and I gotta get work done.

So whats a work-at-home-mom to do?

Grab the BINKY 

the Night-Night

get into the CAR

set the satellite radio to "SPA"

and DRIVE.

Not three minutes ....

THREE MINUTES

down the highway and he's snoring.

Yep.

The plan was to drive to Starbucks and hopefully he'd fall asleep somewhere in between ... if I had to drive to New Mexico, I would have. But he fell asleep much quicker.

But I was STILL going to get my Starbucks.

After all ... he DID wake up at 4:30am.

Sweet success.

I ain't ashamed.

Good luck out there Boss Moms!

You've got this!

Toddler from Hell | Raising the Boys

You ever go to  a doctor's appointment and leave thinking, "Well that was the most pointless appointment in the world?"

Yeah, that just happened.

Let me set the scene:

4am - toddler wakes up and does NOT ... like NOPE ... want to go back to bed. 

415am - said toddler goes into brother's room "Pst! PST! You 'wake?"

430am - I hear said toddler shuffle up to my bed.

433am - I drag said toddler back into his room, him crying, and place him back in bed with a book.

5am - said toddler is quiet.

530am - said toddler is awake again, trying to get brother's attention

545am - both boys are awake and playing in brother's room

6am - (normal time to wake up for school but because we have a doctor's appt, we really don't have to be up until 645am) Big brother is bored and wants to go in front room.

605am - Me, "NO! stay in your room and be quiet!"

610am - Big brother, "but I'm hungry!"

615am - Boys are giggling in brother's room, and I don't care. Just as long as I get to sleep a little longer.

630am - Big brother, "Mom ... Mom ..."     Me, "go away. do you want me to be grumpy?"

635am - toddler screams, I get up and the chaos begins.

640am-715am - brother needs to dress, eat, take meds, clean the mess he and his brother made. Toddler needs fed, dressed and he too needs to pick up his room that he and his brother messed up. I am making snacks for the road trip.

725am - we get in car. head the 20 mins to hospital. But traffic occurs and I take the gateway instead, but that wasn't any quicker as EVERYONE was on the gateway because the highway was backed up. But not as bad as the gateway, so I should've just stayed behind the huge semi carrying 5 billion cars.

750am - I'm about 10 minutes away, and that's good because the appointment is in 10 mins.

758am - enter the hospital entrance just to be called out of the gate entrance for a "random" inspection. I express my frustrations to the MPs, they check the car after I open all doors, the trunk and the hood, and look up the insurance on the phone mobily. (if that's a word)

805am - enter hospital garage.

810am - walk down stairs because elevator is too slow. Enter hospital.

810am-818am - wander around the "first floor" trying to find said doctor office only to find out the floor we entered on (ground level) is actually level 3. So we go down one set of stairs ... wander, then another set (because we didn't know it was level three until we went down the first set of stairs. 

818am - finally get into the doctor office 18 minutes late. He takes us straight in. 

You'd think the story ends there. 

Welp. It doesn't.

Now, my eldest (who has ADHD) has been having other physical issues due to either his meds, diet, mental, .... whatever. So this appointment was to talk to a nutritionist about his diet. I thought it was a good idea and was referred to it by the regular medical doctor as an option.

I mean, if this doc can give some insight to what's going on with my eldest, shit, I'll take the advice.

All throughout the appointment, the doc only spoke to me. My eldest complained he was bored (even though he brought TWO Harry Potter books to read). The toddler touched every single piece of equipment the doctor had.

Every time I corrected the toddler, the toddler would scream. And not like a little shrill, no. Like a full blown scream that rattled the ear drums.

I gave in and gave the phone to the toddler to play games or watch movies. But nope, he kept pushing buttons that messed up the game or stopped the movie. Eldest would "try to help" but in reality he'd just play the game while his little brother screamed because he wanted the phone back.

After about 10 minutes of this, I took the phone away. Thus adding more screams, tears, and tantrums.

The doctor talked to me about proper nutrition, what he should and shouldn't be eating.

And that was it. I was out of the office within 15 minutes.

Guys.

I've heard this schpill 5 billion times already by the other 8 doctors my eldest has seen. The medical doctor. The psychiatrist. The psychologist. The behavior therapist. The GI. The nurse that took the blood pressure .... I mean. What was the point of this appointment?

I thought maybe it was to start a food diary. Or make a meal plan. Or do weekly check ins about meals.

SOMETHING.

But no, that was it.

All that stress, and I don't feel any closer to a solution than I did when I first started this journey. And really, my son didn't need to miss school for this. I had to wait a month to see this doctor, take the kid outta school, and for what? Nothing.

Because of the move, this "issue" that my son has been having has had to restart with everything because each doctor doesn't want to call up the other to ask about progress or what has been going on to deter the issue already. I have offered phone numbers multiple times. Each wants to make their own diagnostic and be the hero.

When in reality, all I want is a solution.

Shit. It took 2 flipping months for my son to finally get prescribed the ADHD meds he needs to focus in school. In which he's been going to school without meds because .... ahem ... military healthcare insurance is great because it's "free" BUT it takes flipping forever to get anything accomplished.

Sigh.

I want to pull my hair out.

I want to go to bed, pull the sheets over my head, and go to sleep ...

for like a MONTH.

Sleeping Beauty had it right. I should prick my finger on the sewing machine I'm pulling out today to make the kids Halloween costumes and fall into a slumber for a month.

Shit, I'll take 10 hours. 

I'll put a note taped to my forehead to my husband that says, "don't kiss me awake until Oct 1."

That'd be the life huh?

But then I'd miss all the giggles, all the hugs and kisses. All the important moments in growing up and all the love they share with me.

It truly is, a catch 20.

Good luck y'all ... and remember there's always chocolate.

You Are What Your Mind Is | 'Werkit' Out Wednesday

Today sucked. 


I woke up too tired. I woke up to grumpy. I didn't want to do anything. 

However, since I started the Strolling Eagles group (part of TeamRWB El Paso), I knew I had to get out of the house and get up with them to do our weekly Wednesday 5K. 

Now, I've been having issues with my stroller keeping air in it's tires. I don't know if it's the desert out here, the heat or if it's just my luck. I have horrible luck with tires. Ask anyone of my friends. I'm always changing a tire on the car, the truck, or pumping air into my stroller. 

The best lesson in life that my dad ever gave me was how to change a tire on the car. Fathers out there ... Make sure you teach your daughter  (or son) how to change a tire. 

It's a very important life lesson. 

Anyways, I did not want to work out today at all, so the fact that I had to put air in the tire again, get my butt all the way to Fort Bliss, and still have to put on a happy face when I see the ladies  ... because actually, I am happy to see them, I just don't want to run. 

By the time I got to Fort Bliss, I was ready to run and get it over. However, we waited, out of courtesy for another woman, who was running a little late. 

Face it,

We know what happens when you have little kids and you're trying to get out the door ... I mean look at me. I really didn't want to come out. 

Either way, we waited 10 minutes and I think that's what got me. My body was like, "Well you're here but you're not running ... so let's just go and be more grumpy."


We finally stepped out on foot through the trail. The trail is dirt, but it's like a graded dirt. It's still hard on a stroller ... pushing a 26 pound child ... and with freshly watered from sprinklers. Not to mention that the tired I just pumped up is now going flat. 

Yeah. 

I was not happy. 

Totally wasn't feeling it, was getting tired, and the sun was hot. It just didn't feel right. My brain was definitely beating my body. 

Luckily, the women that I run with are very supportive and when someone would pass me, they would cheer me on. One lady walked with me for a little bit. But the whole fact is that my brain beat me. 

The brain is the most powerful muscle in your body and if it says it's not going to do something, it's not going to do something. You have to trick it , and tell it that it's not in charge right now. 

Now, we don't want it to totally stop working because we all know what happens when people don't use their brains. However, if we make it work for us and make it think what we want it to think ,we can accomplish anything. 

That's in an any life situation. 

When you're running and you don't want to or you're trying to get to that extra mile you don't want to or if you're trying to get that job and it just seems too out of reach or if you can't reach that promotion that you been trying to get. 

You really have to believe in yourself.

If it's something you really want to accomplish, you're going to accomplish it and you've got to find a way to how to. Whether that's tricking your brain into thinking that you can do it or excepting defeat and try again. 

It's not an issue to accept defeat because sometimes our goals maybe unattainable at the moment. You can't beat yourself up if you don't make it, you try, try again. 

That's one big thing in my family. We never say we can't do something. 

We always try and if we don't succeed, we'll try again or will try to do it a different way. 

I know I won't be the best runner out there. However, if I can be my own personal last timed event, Then I have succeeded in something. 

There's always going to be someone better than you, no matter what you might succeed in. You may succeed in one thing but fail in another. Or you might not succeed in anything but you might just reach that standard and that's okay. 

That's you.

I'm sort of talking in circles right now but the whole fact is that you have to believe in yourself and you have to change your mindset on how you want to achieve your goals or achieve the day. 

If you want to be grumpy all day long, then be grumpy all day long. That's fine. Just understand that if you're grumpy all day long, then your kids will be grumpy all day long, your spouse will be grumpy all day long, whoever you encounter will be grumpy because you're setting off that vibe to everyone. 

Try, just try, to see the good in whatever situation arises. Don't mask it just realize there is a good to a bad. 

I didn't want to go out today and the pharmacy wouldn't fill my sons prescription (a whole other stupid story),  now I have to go to the doctor and do a whole new prescription for him. Blah blah blah.... BUT I still went to that run and I let out that anger on the track ...even though it wasn't my best run.

Not even close.

Though, I can see that if I had gone home and sulked, it would've been a lazy, lazy day and I wouldn't have accomplished anything.

And I would be completely MISERABLE. 

Today's going to be busy, but I've set my mind to accomplish what I need to accomplish today and we'll see how it goes.

Good Luck y'all!

You be YOU!